Foot Schleppen

By JMZ

After the crushingly easy victory for the new socialist front in the November federal elections I decided to follow in one of my heroes sandals and head of in the political wasteland. What do I mean?

Well, for forty days and nights I went on on a complete political fast. That’s right people, since the decision for the new President elect I did not watch, read (sorry Drudge if you overall hits took a major dive) or listen to anything political.

Why did I do it?

Some might be see it as sour grapes, disappointed with the election and unwilling to watch the opposition victory dance? Though there might be a small amount to that, it was more of the fact that after putting so much time in studying, and writing about it all, this political holiday would have occurred regardless of the result. (After all I wasn’t going to do a Bill Cosby dance if McCain had won).

After putting in so much time into reading about it, studying, expounding large amount of brain matter on all the issues at hand I was dog tired. The break has done me wonders. I am refreshed and ready to write again, and not as sad about the prospects for 2009. High comedy could be in the horizon.

But you might ask what I have been doing while President Elect has been building the best basketball team political circles can find, and while the President has been dodging flying shoes. ( Seriously, what would have been really funny was if President Bush caught the thing instead of swerving out of its way and thrown it right back at the Iraqi journalist. Now that would have been fantastic, but as usual I digress.

So what have I really been up to. Well I have decided to be more like the rest of America, and live in ignorance. (No, I did not move to a liberal state, or move in with Bill Maher.)

Much of the time I must admit I did feel like bliss during the past few weeks. And to be honest I have enjoyed my time away so much I have kind of extended it all the way up to new year (seriously is New Year Eve the most overrated holiday in history. Today we celebrate a day on a calender, yeah!!!).

What’s the point of paying too much attention right now. All the news seems to want to do is follow President Elect around while he swings a golf club wildly while not wearing a shirt. Yeah and that was your 6 o’clock news……

So what have been up to…well, lest see…..

Did you know you are allowed to pick up your leaves before the new years?

I honestly thought after living in North Carolina for three years- after escaping the retirement home that is Boccccca RRRRRRRRRRaton that my inability to pick up the leaves was killing my grass each fall season, but after finding time to do some yard work ( ok sweet wife of mine, a little, little yard sweeping) that it is the cooling weather that kills the grass. That and the apparent need grass has for the sun to keep it growing. Dang, where is that global warming hoax when you need it Al Gore!

But seriously I feel like I’ve accomplished something. I’ve got up my leaves at its still 2008. Instead of looking at dead leaves as high as a Vermont snow fall I can look out my window and stare at dead branches that have just fallen out of my trees. Instead of a fire hazard, I can look at a barren wasteland that is my lawn. What I wonderful way to start the new year.

Well I did get some news for a great news source…..espn!!!!!!!

Did you guys really think I would cheat and read what was going on in the world? Only if it involved the Sports Guy Bill Simmons. Sorry, I’m not like those guys who say there going on a vacation but they still bring their laptop and cell phone.

However ESPN did allow me the fortune on knowing two pieces of high comedy. Firstly if an NFL player invites me to go club hopping with him I’ll pass and go shooting with the Vice President instead. It’s safer. The New York Giants are in trouble, thanks Plaxico.

Talking of sports……

In sports there is a thing known and a make-up call. This is when a referee will make a call in a game to make up for a bad one that occurred earlier in the game. I mention this because OJ Simpson getting a minimum of nine years must be the greatest makeup call in the legal history. I wonder what the make -up call would look like for Roe V Wade. ( oh well).

oh speaking of ESPN, I wonder when they will start the Brett Farve coming back- retirement talk, oh it has already good the world has not ended just yet- that’s happening Inauguration Day (I’m just kidding)

Honey take out the trash….. ah yes housework…no comment because

Did you know the night is for sleeping….

….really. For example one Saturday I went to sleep early (before midnight) and slept till 10am for the first time in five years. Actually I did not know you could actually accomplish this and still be a responsible parent. Furthermore I took a nap during the afternoon for about an two hours, and while watching a movie with the first born that evening, fell asleep half way through. I feel wonderfully disgusting. And yes I wish I was sleeping rather than writing this right now.

Why read when you can watch crap……

Finally caught a glimpse of Dark Knight. Bits and pieces anyways. while working a shift Blockbuster (remember I picked up a second job to help pay for our adoption). All I can say the thing is wayyyyyy overrated and while this takes all of the money too few people will see the fantastic Man on Wire, which I reviewed on Film is.pwn.

In fact I have been catching up on a bunch of my favorite movies lately, which here is my all time list here.

I don’t care if their not the greatest movies made of all time. It is my favorite list. You can read more about how I got to the list on the link above. I also wrote about the best movies of 2008. People, trust me there was not many.

I grew a beard in anticipation of Hanukkah…

No this is not some really smart by heading. I really did. Looks pretty good. Yeah I really have to get back to studying….

Speaking of the adoption…..

The process continues far more slowly that my wife and I wold like but the support continues for strangers and family that continues to bless us greatly. There is no doubt however that it has a been a greatly difficult process, which can be as trying as the deep seas. (But what a view it will be once the horizon comes into vision. Shedell, Ivana and I can’t wait for the horizon, but we know it’s getting close).

Funny story….the family and I were at Sam’s Club today and women came up to me trying to sell me some windows. I politely declined, but she persisted. I informed her that though I would love new windows all of our finances are going into an adoption and I just can’t afford new windows. Here’s the rest of the conversation.

lady: So where are you adopting from, Australia?

Me: No Ethiopia.

lady: Wow you really must be rich?

(what did she just say. I thought I just said I couldn’t afford much of anything)

Me: Um, naw I’m broke. Thanks for your time.

I’ve heard some funny, rude and ignorant statements during our process, but that one is up there…..

anyways…wrote a poem after a tough conversation with my Sheddy after hearing our process isn’t as far ahead as we thought….. you can hit the link here….Some things are truly worth battling for….

Did you know I have a child, I thought I spend some time with her.

Actually this is an exaggeration, considering I spend time her my baby in large bunches. This was more put in here to plug the next thing I am going to write about…our Christmas….for next week. Well what else to do you want to read about in the second week of th e new year after credit card buyers remorse has kicked in..more about Christmas…..

That’s about it. I think I worked a little too. I still have two jobs after all…..I am allowed to lazy from time to time. Aren’t you glad I’m back to scribbling down stuff on ‘Shleppen?!